Relationship Musings

I don't think that you can be in a relationship and not love the other person. I'm talking about being in love necessarily but loving them as another human being. Looking back, every person that I've had some type of relationship with-whether we were dating, just talking, or a completely platonic friend, there's been mutual affection. The ability to care for that other person is what makes the relationship, otherwise they have no special importance in your life.


Within the past year I've finished a relationship, I've been completely single, and I've been in that 'talking' phase several times. Going even further back to the guys that I was first interested in, I was interested in them for a reason. I couldn't help but love them for who they are. Yes, I am able to take a step back and see them as a person, flaws and all, but it doesn't change how I feel about them-it just changes the relationship. Example: one guy that I had talked to for a few months had some qualities that just bothered me. There was nothing too odd or creepy about him but those things kept us from meshing completely. But at the same time, I loved talking to him because what he would share with me. He was the first and only guy that had no problem delving into the minute details about his life starting with when he woke up. But then there were other guys where we weren't too close because neither of us had the time to take a relationship and make it work.

But it's always looking back that I'm able to understand more and move on from what I've learned. Which is the beauty of a relationship, knowing it's end and it's closure. Two completely different things but both necessary to moving on. The end is when you realize the relationship is over,whether or not you're still with the other person in some matter. The closure is when you've realized why the relationship didn't work, what you've learned from it, and could potentially be completely platonic friends with the other person. Sometimes it takes a while.

I will admit that there are one or two guys that I look back with sadness because of my inability to realize what kind of people they were. We didn't mesh and I let it go on for too long and ended up hurting them. But since I believe in karma, I'm well aware that this'll happen to me one day.

Love and let learn.